women are not apple trees

Girls are like

apples on trees. The best

ones are at the top of the tree.

The boys don’t want to reach for

the good ones because they are afraid

of falling and getting hurt. Instead, they

just get the rotten apples from the ground

that aren’t as good, but easy. So the apples

at the top think something is wrong with

them, when in reality, they’re amazing.

They just have to wait for the right

boy to come along, the one

who’s brave enough

to climb

all the way

to the top

of the tree.

At first glance, this seems like a nice sentiment, right?  It's even a shape poem, so that's cool.

I have major issues with it.

Things like this just reinforce the disparity that, unfortunately, already exists between young women.  We compete.  It's not good, its not healthy, and thankfully most of us grow out of it.  There are girls who have lots of boys interested in them - usually because they are witty, or fun, or a good listener.  Sometimes, dare I say it, because they are pretty.  

These girls are not, as the poem above would suggest, rotten apples.  They are girls who are comfortable with themselves, who may have matured faster, bloomed at an earlier age.  They may have had an easier time in high school. Undoubtedly, there will be some who made questionable choices about the way they would treat other girls their age, and surely there are some who will prove to have rotten moments.  But rotten-ness certainly cannot be determined by how many boys they do or do not date.

My main problem with this is that it basically says that a woman's place on this proverbial "apple tree" is determined by whether or not she has been pursued by a man.  This not only is incorrect, but a dangerous thing to be telling the high school aged women whom this thing is directed towards.  Your identity is in your hobbies, talents, goals, and pursuits, not in whether or not a boy thinks your special.

Some girls date a lot. Some don't.  And its ok either way.

There is quite enough competition, self-esteem issues, and second guessing of oneself that goes on in high school (and beyond) without contributing to that with ill-thought-out shape poems.

Women are not apple trees. Women are people. Nothing more and nothing less.